I read an article written by a spouse whose wife was 56 years old and had a level 4 ruptured brain aneurysm. The medical staff did not think she was going to survive, and when she did survive, they didn't think she would be able to get out of bed, or if she did get out of bed, she would be quite disabled. Sound familiar?
His wife survived, has no signs of the occurrence, except for weak muscles from laying so long and the need to write on post-it notes for everything to remember to do.
One thing he mentioned in the article that made me think was that since he had to become an advocate for his wife, because the medical staff were basing his wife's treatment as though she was not going to survive or be capable of doing things for herself, he became over-protective. Now, that her recovery is progressing, he continues to unknowingly over-protect, which, doesn't allow her to have trial and error for her to relearn things that may have been forgotten. Like Bob, she has all of her long-term memory; she just needs to write a lot of notes for present day occurrences. (heck, I need to do that!)
Anyhow, what he said made me think that I have a tendency too to be such a "mother hen" now. Maybe, I need to back up and let Bob do for himself. He has also become quite dependant on me. He doesn't leave me out of his sight for very long. I thought it was cute, but, maybe, it's not a good thing for his recovery. I'm his security blanket, I suppose.
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